Lately, I've been depressed. There stress of the holidays and financial obligations have got me down, somewhat. But I need to tell you, being depressed is NOT EASY! Yes, "Who does depression hurt? It hurts..everyone." Blah, blah, blah. It's not easy THAT way, but it's just not easy being depressed in general sometimes.
The truth is, try as I might to be depressed...and apparently I work hard at it...there are many barriers to a real good, down-in-the-dumps, cry-your-eyes-out depressive state. Here are the top five:
1. Pesky, loveble kids - You do your best to get into a real dark funk and what do these ankle biters do? They hug you, kiss you, call you Daddy! They bat their eyes, do cute things, and draw you pictures of you with your head 8 times the size of your body. They are a constant reminder of the good things in your life. This is my biggest obstacle when trying to succumb to a foul mood.
2. Girlfriends who care about you - this is a particularly difficult one to get past. Despite my self depreciating view of myself and belief that I'm an old, fat, goofy middle ager, my girlfriend insists on caring about me. She likes to kiss me and be affectionate. She is relentless in her quest to show me how important I am in her life and her appreciation for the man that I am. Damn her!
3. Supportive family and friends - these people refuse to just let me have a pity party. They constantly tell me how much they love me, what kind of a nice guy I am and how I make them laugh. They are there for me no matter what kind of crappy day I'm trying to have. They just won't let me dive into endless unhappiness. Not sure what else I can say about these do-gooders!
4. Stable job - Yes! I know I'm lucky to have a job. Yes, I'm paid reasonably well. It's not MY fault! I didn't hire me! But yet, I get a steady paycheck which allows me to pay for many of my bills and sometimes even have fun. At times it just doesn't seem fair that these ridiculous "employers" insist on letting me run amuck for 40 plus hours a week. Unbelievable!
5. Basic love of life and optimism - This is something I have had to live with all my life. Thanks Mom! I have always had to bend under the burden of laidbackism. I have tried to make people laugh, find humor in many situations, and act like a kid! Enough! No matter how hard I try to feel like a victim, my damn good nature aggressively tries to crowd out the dark visitor called unhappiness. Just when I'm ready to give up, something comes along that makes me laugh and perks me up. It is just frustrating to have to believe in myself time and time again. Really!
So if you really want to be depressed during this holiday season or randomly throughout the year, you MUST avoid these barriers at all cost. And beware, they can sneak up on you at any time. It isn't pretty, people!
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